As we head into this holiday season I am finding that I am actually looking forward to it in a way that I haven’t felt in several years. Growing up I always enjoyed and anticipated the holidays but after my father passed away in December 2007 I’ve felt a bit removed from them. The first year, Christmas came less than two weeks after his passing and I was in a fog for much of it. Christmas morning felt odd, like I had been away for some time and we were celebrating Christmas the week after it had actually occurred. I survived it and my family was lovely, especially Sully and his parents but it was fairly awful. It’s not surprising though that in subsequent years that I felt less than my usual enthusiastic holiday spirit.
This year I feel better and I am glad for it. I am not sure if I am feeling better because enough time has past and the memories of that Christmas have faded. My father in law passed in April and now it’s my turn to get Sully and Boo through the holidays. So, whether it’s the distraction of helping others or that time is healing these wounds, I am feeling good and engaged in the holidays this year.
Now, if only I could get my house decorated and all of the boxes back into the garage.
My holiday thought…
This year I am going to enjoy it. I am not going to spend all of my energy trying to get stuff done. I will still get stuff done but this year I am going to take the time to be a part of it all.