Today I am taking my cue from another blog.  I’ve mentioned before that I read the awesome blog Reinventing Fabulous written by the incredible authors, Jennifer Crusie, Lani Diane Rich and Anne Stuart (Krissie).  Every Wednesday Lani posts a short entry of amazing insight .  It’s WTF Wednesday, sometimes the F is for fabulous and sometimes it’s for the other F word.  Everyone can talk about the fab or f*%$*d stuff in their lives.

Today her post was entitled, Yes.   Here is what she says…

“In improv, there’s a Yes, And Rule. Which means, that whenever someone proposes anything in the fiction, no matter how preposterous, your role is to accept that reality, and then add something new to it. No shuts things down; no stops all movement. Yes keeps things going, and And brings them somewhere new.”
saying yes

This is so true.   We’ve all had conversations with people that have said no even before  we’ve finished speaking.  Does anyone still feel like talking after that?  Definitely not me, I’d have spun around and left the room at that point…well, most of the time anyway.  Saying no effectively ends any attempt at conversation.

There are times, of course, when you want to shut down the conversation, like when Boo is telling me how hungry she is 3o minutes before dinnertime and that one cookie will really help.  Uhmmm, no, you had lunch at a reasonable hour (and most likely a snack in the afternoon) you can wait the half hour until dinner is ready.  Or with door to door salespeople.   I have a note on the door that reads “No soliciting of any kind.  Thank you.”  I still get people ringing the doorbell and knocking.  I don’t answer the door unless I know someone is stopping by but occasionally a salesperson will catch me heading to the mailbox or watering the flowers.   I try to be polite but sometimes I just end up saying ‘no’ over and over until they leave.

The important thing is to say yes to keep the good things moving along.  Sometimes you have to say yes by doing something new or scary.  That isn’t always easy and it can take a lot of courage to take that first step.  Sometimes you just have to hold your breath and close your eyes and just go.  I am terrible about this but I try to think of what I would say to Boo or Sully or Faith.  I would tell them to channel their inner warrior.  Several months ago I had a similar conversation with my niece who was getting ready to start community college and was a bit nervous about driving on the freeway.  She’s a great driver but her commute involved three different freeways and all during rush hour traffic.  I told her to channel Princess Leia (Star Wars) or Zoe (Firefly) or (insert my niece’s suggestion here, I don’t remember).  Do you think any of these strong women would be daunted by traffic?  They had a job to do and they would overcome any obstacle to get where they needed to go.  It worked, my niece wasn’t nervous and she got to and from school without any issues.

Hopefully, I will be able to channel my inner warrior and say yes.  This year is full of opportunities and I can’t wait to see what I can do.

Phase 1: Day 18
I had a pretty good walk, a little over 13 minutes and 0.7 miles.  I started off too fast and ended up with the shin pain midway through my walk.  At some point I am hoping that I find the right stride so I can just walk because this is making me crazy.  
I only did one set of my lower body workout because I am starting to feel not good.  I really don’t want to be sick and I am doing anything and everything I can to get enough rest and take care of myself .  Hopefully,  I will be less susceptible to catching whatever is going around.
Water = 44 ounces 


I am often surprised after finishing a project. Usually it’s a project that I have put off for months, possibly years.  My surprise comes from how quick and easy the project ended up being.  I put off making a cornice box over our kitchen window for the longest time and it took less than an hour to make.  It took longer to sew the valance for the cornice box.  

There have been several other projects that have gone the same way.  I cut a cat door into the garage and moved the litter boxes out of the house.  We had those weird sliding doors in the bedrooms that overlapped cutting off easy access to that middle part of the garage, I removed them in Boo’s room and put up a curtain.  I ended up doing the same in the third bedroom.  It really helped, it was much easier to get into the closet and it made the room look bigger.  I could name a few other projects but that’s not the point.

The point is that I have put off taking care of me for far too long.  Just like these projects I have seen myself as a project that was overwhelming.  The “me” project was going to take too long.  It’s too involved.  There’s no foreseeable end.   Too much time and effort.  I need to focus on Sully, Boo, or (insert name here).   There are so many more important things that I need to fix first.

I had thought of all of the excuses to not take care of me.  This year I am thinking about all of the reasons that I should take care of me.  It’s not overwhelming, I can make small changes along the way.  There is no time limit, I am a work in progress.  I need to take care of me so that I can help everyone else.  The hardest… I am important, my well being is important not only to me but to everyone around me.

It was easy to write those reasons but it will take some time before they sink in.  I will continue to repeat them to myself until I believe it.  It is clear to me that it will be a struggle some days.  I am giving myself permission to focus on myself.  I am starting to realize that a better me will be more helpful to Boo and Sully.  It makes sense that a healthier, stronger and more well rested me would be better prepared to face the challenges in our lives.

I’ve realized this past year that I really want to make this change not only for me but also for Boo.  I watched my mom put everyone ahead of herself time and time again.  I understand it and of course, I see myself doing it now.  The problem is that over time she became fairly bitter about it.  The other side effect of her ignoring her needs is that she never went to the doctor and her health suffered.  I want Boo to learn that it’s important to take good care of yourself.  I want to be that good example for Boo.

It’s not going to be easy but I am going to try to make more moments that are all about me.  It’s important, and after all I have my permission.

Phase 1:  Day 4…

I had a good walk I am up to 12 minutes.

Today was my lower body workout.  2 sets of 15, with only minor fatigue at the end of the second set.  

Water = 56 ounces


Plan 2013…

So, I’ve given up on resolutions for me, but I have a plan. Famous last words, right?  I’d rather have a plan for change than a few resolutions that are forgotten by February 1st.


For 2013, I am going to continue the good habits I started at the end of 2012, and add a few new ones too. Last year, I realized that I need to take care of me, so that I can be there for everyone else.

So, here’s a basic sketch of my plan…

– Health and fitness (eat better and exercise daily)
– Writing (Rewrites for NaNo ’09, finish other WIP)
– House projects (laundry redo, build bookshelves, etc.)
– Yard projects (fix sprinklers, grass in back yard, etc.)
– Fun stuff (bellydancing and craft projects)

I am feeling good about this year. Good times ahead!

Happy New Year!



Happy New Year…

Sully, Boo and I stayed up to watch the ball drop in Times Square.   We counted down, Sully and I had our midnight kiss and we gave Boo hugs.  We had Mimosa’s to toast each other.  Boo just had orange juice, her choice of drink for the midnight festivities.  



I hope everyone had a safe and Happy New Year!
On to bigger and better things for all of us!

NaNo success…



I finally got my 50,000 words.  It wasn’t easy given the vacation, the holiday and the events of this week.  My word count topped out at 52,053, and I am quite positive that about 10,000 of it is mush but at least I worked through it and got to 50K.

My goal now is to stay with it.  I’ll need to go back and re-edit the mush part so that I can continue on and get the rest of the re-writes and edits done.  I’d like to get a proof copy by March so that I can do any last minute editing before June the deadline for getting my five free copies of the finished book.

It’s time for me to get a move on with all of this.  I’ve got these four books to finish, well five now, plus I have a few other ideas that I need to work on.   I am going to work hard through December so that I can be already on the move when the New Year starts.